additives in food make me angry

I am so angered by additives in food. My 8 year old son is very touchy with artificial additives, all of them. Some of the "natural" ones to. I recently found out that he has epilepsy and is on medication to stop the "MELT DOWNS" The agression, anger and down right abuse from him is unbearable. I've gone from cutting out additives, gluten, now dairy. His behaviour was so much better but for the "MELT DOWN" every few days. Apparently hes been having seizures at night, then is nuts the next day. It's horrible. I have nearly given up so many times, but the stubborn strek keeps me going. I have now got him on anti siezure medication that has stopped the "MELT DOWNS" but now hes mean and ignorant and hurtful because of the coloured coating on the pill I'm giving him. How the hell do I win. It doesn't help that I've just had to recently get grommits in my 6 yr old sons ears beacuse his ears were almost totally blocked and was most of the time deaf because of it. I also have a 4 year old girl and 3 year old boy. They are all now on an additive, dairy, gluten free diet. It's stressful beyond belief, but what I would really love is for other people to look at their kids diets. Check how many colours, flavours and preservatives are in the kids diet. Their are more items on the shelves now than when I began the additive free diet, but we all need to cut them out, they are poisining our children. Also enquire whats in the medicine, what we give them to make them better, is also (a lot of the time) containing harmful additives. Please help. I would love to hear how other mothers cope, I'm certainly not coping!