In a discussion about keeping your house clean without keeping your kids in cages, Rowina wrote about what a difficult issue cleaning has been for her:

I want to keep the house clean, but at eleven or midnight, I don't want to clean it. And when I say want, I mean really, REALLY want to, to the point of being anxious if I do something else (computer, bed) instead of cleaning. It has taken me months to get a point where I can even begin to consider the dilemma rationally. And it is precisely this that motivates me--I do NOT want my kids to feel this way about cleaning! Or anything! EVER!

The article on the old TCS website ( www.tcs.ac ) about cleaning really helped me change my perspective.

Feeling ghastly about housework is horribly common, and wanting not to cause your children to grow up having the same conflicts is a commendable start. I hope that anyone in this situation will be able to move beyond that to replace the horrible intractable conflicts, anxiety and self-sacrifice with the peace of actually solving these problems. As one who has been there and come out the other side, thanks to insights gleaned from fellow TCS folks, I have a lot to say about this, so lookout for another article on this soon. In the meantime, here is the piece Rowina found helpful. It is by Starlene Stewart, and was originally posted on the TCS List on Sun, 3 Jan 1999 13:37:20 -0800.